He woke up the following morning with the same set of afflictions: Still bitter about the dreams. Still carrying the mental fatigue that was not accompanied by a physical one. Still overwhelmed by the rush of conflicting emotions, sudden images, and painful memories. Still feeling like shit. But, despite everything, he was feeling a little less like shit. Credit to that what you will: An enjoyable night spent with the only peers of his that he could truly relate to. An afternoon of catharsis and bawling one’s eyes out. Maybe even just the passage of time. But one truth was inescapable. Sam was feeling noticeably better this morning when compared to any other morning of the last fifteen days. Hopefully, it was going to last.

  The lesson with Lin passed following the same trajectory of the past week: inching ever closer towards a return to the previous routine. To him being able to train in all earnestness and learning or practicing something new every session. They didn’t learn or practice anything new today, but they finally returned to the last set of exercises that Lin had taught him on Thursday two weeks ago.

  “Ritter told me that you’ve changed from your usual schedule,” Lin said midway through the last break of their session, as though it was of no concern to him.

  “Yeah. Taking it a little easier for the foreseeable future. More breaks. That sort of stuff. But he also agreed to start moving forward with my studies again. So it’s a trade-off in a way.”

  “I can see that. It makes a lot of sense. Obviously, I’ve never trained someone in your… circumstances before, but I know very well that you can’t expect a person to act like a robot and push through every difficulty. But that’s as far as your studies go. Do our lessons remain the same?”

  “Yeah. Only reason why they wouldn’t is when stuff like last week, where I’m physically unable to, happens.”

  “Very well. Keep me updated, nonetheless. You have advanced far enough in the short time we’ve been training to allow yourself a break or two if you need it. Or if you want to move our future appointments from today to Sunday. That’s also fine.”

  “No, that’s alright. I prefer them today. A good reason to get out of bed regularly and on schedule. And I don’t like the idea of sleeping in. Not one bit.”

  “As you wish. Let’s continue then.”

  Half an hour later and he was eating breakfast with Sarah and Yvessa. “So did you have fun last night?” Sarah asked her.

  “No.” Yvessa scowled.

  “That bad?” Sam asked.

  “No… I guess not. It was mostly fine. The people were the best part of the evening, which I suppose is something I should be happy about.”

  “Depends on their objective quality and not just the comparative.”

  “That’s true, but they were pretty nice. Had a good enough time when I managed to ignore the loud music and general atmosphere. It doesn’t matter though. We ended up leaving early, thankfully. I’m pretty sure I got back before you guys did.”

  “Felix got lucky then?” Sarah smiled.

  Yvessa nodded. “And I am eternally grateful for that.”

  “Good for him,” Sam said. “At least one of us is bucking the trend of us all being basically the same person. Socially wise.”

  “The same person?” Sarah asked.

  “Do you like clubs?”

  “No.”

  “Do you enjoy casual sex? Do you like getting drunk? Do you have a ton of friends? You get the picture. The three of us are basically all on the same scale of being a nerdy, friendless virgin, with me being the base and you two somewhere further up the line, a little more normal, but still relatively similar.”

  “I think all three of us are perfectly normal,” Yvessa said.

  “Obviously. I was just exaggerating to prove a point. That from a certain perspective, the three of us are very similar in a lot of qualities and behaviors, while Felix is very far from us in those aspects.”

  “He doesn’t have that many more friends than us,” Sarah muttered.

  “Yes he does. It doesn’t mean anything, it’s not an insult to us or a compliment to him. But he definitely does.”

  Yvessa nodded. “Even if I were just counting my friends from back home to his. He wins.”

  “Again, it’s not a competition. If it were, you would also get a bunch of points from having really powerful people as friends.”

  “Why is that important?”

  “I don’t know. Why does the number of friends matter? Some people only have the one friend and they are completely satisfied. Some people only have their romantic partner and they don’t need anyone else. You want to say Felix is better than those people because he’s pretty likable and likes to fuck around a bunch? I don’t think so.”

  “So it’s the satisfaction you derive from your friendships that matters? If this were a competition? I’d agree with that, I suppose. If a person doesn’t want any friends and is happy just living alone, that shouldn’t count as a demerit.”

  “I’m warning you two…” Sarah frowned at them. “Don’t even think about saying that I’m feeling less satisfied with my friends than Felix does.”

  Sam and Yvessa exchanged glances. “I wasn’t going to,” she said.

  “I didn’t even think of that as a possibility.” Sam nodded.

  “Good. So what time did you end up coming back yesterday, Yvessa?”

  “Around quarter to eleven.”

  “That really is early,” Sam said. “You only left at eight-thirty, right?”

  “Yeah. Like I said, we were both fortunate last night.”

  “Well I got back to my room about eleven, elven-oh-five, maybe. So you’re right. You did come back before us.”

  “Had a good time as well, then?”

  “Yes,” Sarah said before Sam had a chance to confirm the same (while still putting a less positive spin on the evening). “The food was great. The setting was great. There was live music. The drinks were good. We talked a lot. It was awesome.”

  “You to, Sam?”

  He smiled and gave her a thumbs up. “I would only add the caveat that it took a long time for each course to come out, which added to our away time. But we still stayed a long time after the dessert was eaten and the bill cleared. Which is not something that I have ever partaken in before. At least not to that length.”

  “Maurice reserved the table for the whole evening,” Sarah said. “You don’t have to worry about the restaurant losing money because of us.”

  “So what’d you talk about?” Yvessa asked.

  “Earth stuff, mostly. Maurice did impressions at one point.”

  Yvessa chuckled, but after noticing that Sarah appeared completely serious, she turned to Sam with a questioning gaze. Sam nodded in answer. “Yeah, she’s telling the truth. After we finished with the dessert, he started doing impressions. Some of them were even pretty good. It’s a real shame that he has a beard and not a more stereotypical mustache because his Peter Seller’s Clouseau was definitely his best bit. I think I told him that yesterday, no?”

  “You did tell him.” Sarah smiled. “Then you did Nixon.”

  “Yeah… I don’t do a very good Nixon.”

  “I think it was pretty good. Your JFK also wasn’t all that bad.”

  “Eh, they were pretty bad. I think my main problem, besides just being bad at impression due to lack of natural talent and never practicing them, is that I’m not doing the person themselves, but rather comedians imitating that person.”

  “Did Maurice do any modern impressions?” Yvessa asked.

  “He did, of… what’s her name? The PM from when the eastern front opened. But I don’t even know her name, so I couldn’t tell you if it was good.”

  “It wasn’t,” Sarah said. “But she’s pretty much like the modern Nixon or JFK. Everybody does her.”

  Sam chuckled. “Damn… Felix would’ve loved that setup.”

  Sarah smiled and turned to ask Yvessa, “Did you manage to decide what you’re going to do during the break?”

  “Yeah… I’ll be heading home for a week. A week and two days, I suppose, counting to and from. I figured that I have to since I’m definitely not going to on the next two breaks. Finalized everything yesterday after the final exam.”

  “So when are you leaving?” Sam asked.

  “Next Friday.”

  “Well, have fun. Watch out for Farris. Don’t let him drag you to his meeting with me.”

  “You think he would?”

  “Why are you asking me? You should know him better than I do.”

  “I don’t think that’s true at this point. Besides, no offense to Farris, but I’m planning to spend the first day back just with my parents. So anyone else will have to wait.”

  “Keep in touch with us anyway,” Sarah said. “Don’t go forgetting about us while you’re there.”

  “You can forget about me if you want,” Sam said.

  “No she can’t.”

  “I wasn’t going to.” Yvessa smiled. “I’ll send you all daily updates. You know… I was actually thinking of inviting all of you to come with me.”

  “Really?” Sam asked.

  “Yeah. I mean, that would be an actual vacation for all of you guys, but especially for you. Getting to see a new world, different people and cultures. But I figured you were going to say no.”

  “Correct.”

  “And if you weren’t going, then Sarah wasn’t either.”

  “Also correct,” Sam said. Sarah frowned at him but didn’t disagree.

  “So the best-case scenario was just having Felix coming with me. And since you guys wouldn’t be there, that would mean that I would have to take a very active part in his vacation plans since he wasn’t going to just go places by himself—”

  “Another major point of difference between him and me then.”

  “Which pretty much nixed that plan in the bud. But, maybe next time I’m heading back you guys will come? Surely in a year you could allow yourself a week off, Sam.”

  “We’ll see what happens in a year, in a year.”

  “There’s no way you are spending the next year without having a week of rest,” Sarah said.

  “What do you call all the free time I had this week and every coming week going forward for the immediate future? It adds up to way more than a week.”

  “You’re not seriously trying to argue that having three days out of six ‘end’ earlier than usual counts as a week’s vacation, right??”

  “Nah, not really. But my point was, if that’s all I need right now, then in the future, who’s to say that I’ll need a whole week of rest, like you said?”

  “First of all, I am of the opinion that you need way more rest right now. Secondly, fatigue builds up. Everybody needs rest to perform optimally. You’ll get your week of rest whether or not you want it in the end, by sheer virtue of everyone around you refusing to engage with your attempts at training or studying. And trust me, there is only so much you can study or train alone.”

  “Well there you have it then. The future of my ‘week of rest,’ rests in the hands of my educators. It is up to them to determine when I am due my leave.”

  “Like in a year’s time when you’ll be integrated to the academy proper?” Yvessa asked. “And you’ll have the same trimester break as everyone else?”

  “Same trimester break maybe, not same overall curriculum. But honestly, we’re getting ahead of ourselves. Who knows what’s going to happen in a year? I’m certainly not going to worry about whether I’ll be able to take a vacation to Larsus by then.”

  “Alright,” Sarah said, “we’ll cross this bridge when we get to it. Until then, you have a full day of rest waiting for you today, right?”

  Sam shrugged. “Unless I muster up the power to do any studying or training. Or Farris changes his mind in the last second and decides to abandon his scheme of wasting governmental resources.”

  “So, in other words, it’s up to you, then.”

  “Essentially.”

  “Fine… I’ve already lectured you on this front enough, so I’ll just leave this be… Do you know what movie are you going to watch?”

  “Nope. Farris still hasn’t told me. Not sure why… Giving it fifty-fifty on whether he just wants it to be a surprise, because he’s an asshole like that, or whether he simply hasn’t picked it yet. I just hope it won’t be a long one. I already feel bad about taking so much call time as it is.”

  This story originates from Royal Road. Ensure the author gets the support they deserve by reading it there.

  “Stop worrying about it.” Yvessa waved him off. “There’s rarely enough demand for all the rooms to be occupied. Especially by people who have a personal call to make, which I assume are the only people you’re really worried about, right?”

  “Pretty much, yeah. People like you.”

  “Well, people like me are few and far between these walls. Most cadets here are New Terra born. And the most of the few that aren’t, like Felix, still come from the republic. Which means that the internet connection is good enough for them to be able to call back home through their screens. Most of the inter-worlds personal calls are actually done by staff. And it’s their job to allow your own personal time to triumph over theirs on the rare occasion that they both come to blows.”

  “I don’t know about that latter part. But I get your point. Plus, you’re right, I’ve never actually seen all the rooms there occupied. Still not going to be comfortable with sitting and watching a directors’ cut of a Ridley Scott movie, though.”

  Sarah chuckled. “Worst-case scenario, you can get up in the middle of the movie and just leave.”

  “What? I wouldn’t do that to him. Not matter how funny it would be and how much cooler than I really am it would make me seem.”

  Less than a minute later, Sarah’s phone alarm rang out, reminding her that she had to leave for combat practice. A prudent move on her part, seeing as she had already finished eating almost ten minutes before. Quickly getting up, she bid them a hurried goodbye before making off with her tray.

  “Well…” Sam stretched in his seat. “Guess that we might head out as well, no?”

  “Fine by me. But I want to grab an ice cream bar first. So come along if you will.”

  “Fine by me.” Sam followed her.

  “So what are you going to do until lunch?” she asked him once they were outside.

  “Don’t know yet. Why?”

  “I thought we could watch Unification and Integration together again.”

  “You sure? I’m ahead of you, aren’t I?”

  “Only by one episode, unless you watched it since yesterday morning?”

  “Nope.”

  “So one episode, I can make it up later. And truth be told, it was more fun watching it with you.”

  “Really? Why?” Sam was flabbergasted.

  “I don’t know. Because we can talk about what’s happening, I guess? Makes it more engaging.”

  “I don’t commiserate one bit, I’m afraid. Still, if you want to come and watch with me, I’m game. It’s definitely a good enough activity to satisfy all parts of my brain.”

  “Great. Let’s go. Want to watch at it in my room? It’s closer to Web Communications. Oh, on a second thought, I’ll need to leave a bit early to grab lunch, so you’ll probably prefer to watch at yours, right?”

  “Yeah, that makes sense.” Sam nodded. “Thanks for the offer, though. After a couple of seconds of walking in silence, he asked, “No one put you up to this, right?”

  She scoffed. “Stop being so paranoid. I’m being serious. Watching with you has been more fun that watching alone. I’m trying to maximize my pleasure right now. Surely you can understand that?”

  “That I can understand. How the interaction you chose accomplishes that, though… I’ll wait and see.”

  Turned out that Yvessa really was speaking the truth, for she seemed greatly animated all throughout the three episodes they watched together. The previous time she also commented plenty, but she must’ve been somewhat subdued by Sam’s energies on the day because today she was rarely silent for more than a couple of minutes. She was a good watchmate, though. Let it not be said that Sam suffered watching alongside her. She kept her commentary to the downtime in the episode, when there wasn’t anyone speaking but her. And while Sam couldn’t say that he greatly preferred this watching experience to his solo one, she did enrich the viewing by providing more insight on the topics and giving Sam more to think about.

  There was one weird thing about the experience, though, he realized after she left, at least from his perspective. And it had to do with him. For the lack of a better word, he had just finished playing the host to Yvessa which was completely his choice. And yet all throughout the morning, Sam wasn’t concerned for one moment about how he was playing his part. Whether Yvessa was enjoying her time with him or not.

  “Definitely something to talk to the therapist about…” he muttered, “eventually.”

  He quickly pushed that fruitless line of thought out of his head and turned his mind to using the half an hour that remained to him before he had to go get lunch and meet up with Farris. “Cultivating?” he wondered aloud. Cultivating, came the silent answer. So he settled down on the chair for a session of cultivation. And only came to once his alarm rang. Thankfully, he remembered to set it the day prior because otherwise it might’ve taken some time until he broke off his focus.

  He turned off the alarm with sluggish pace, distracted by thoughts of what had just happened. Losing half an hour wasn’t much to write home about, but losing it like this, to cultivating? And today? He wasn’t expecting something like that to happen. Rather, he expected to either give up after a few middling attempts that made him frustrated. Or for his attempts to be a little more sharp but still far from adequate (and not frustrating to the point that it will force him to drop the session). Instead, what he got was a very good session, objectively speaking. No failed cycles, barely any mistakes, and overall, a good pace. Of course, the real cause célèbre was that his focus did not waver even once.

  “Better not to think about it too much. Either way.” He shook his head and got up. But, ironically, he hadn’t quite managed to do that. Instead, most of his thoughts as he walked to the mess hall and from there to the Web Communications complex were about his short session of cultivation. Good and bad, hope and cynicism swirled in his mind. Sometimes even managing to form coherent thoughts and sentences, much to Sam’s dismay.

  “You look distracted,” Farris remarked. He was already sitting on the floor, ready for the movie, it seemed.

  Sam took a sit next to his mentor. “What are we watching?”

  “You seriously think I’m just going to let you change the subject?”

  “Just drop it Farris, it’s not a big deal.”

  “I will if you’ll tell me that what you were thinking about doesn’t have anything to do with me—”

  “It doesn’t—”

  “Or with your training.”

  “Pretty much everything I can think about is in some way connected to my training.”

  “Sure but we both know that since you didn’t deny that it does, and instead came up with that bullshit line, that I’m right. So… what’s troubling my precocious young protégé?”

  “Don’t call me any of those things.”

  “I’m willing to drop precocious. Anything else is no go. So what’s up?”

  Sam sighed. “It’s nothing. I… I just had a relatively good session of cultivating before I came here. So I’m all caught up thinking about that. Stupid, I know.”

  “We both know that it’s not stupid. It’s very reasonable. Let me guess. One part of you is hoping that this is a sign of things to come and that all the difficulties you had with cultivating the last two weeks will start slowly fading away. And another part is just thinking that it was a onetime thing, and nothing to be hopeful about. Then there’s also the part that’s angry about being happy for something so minor.”

  “It’s… something like that, yeah.”

  “Like I said, very reasonable. Anyway, don’t worry about it either way. It doesn’t matter how this one session of cultivation went for you, because, right now, it doesn’t matter how any session of cultivation goes for you. Do them if you want. Have a great time or a shit time. Give up midway or never even start. Doesn’t matter. You’re already cultivating more than enough with Dan. Even with the added breaks you’ve got this week.”

  “Yeah, I was wondering if you were going to mention that.”

  “What? Just because we’re going to watch a movie, you think I’m going to leave all of my educational obligations by the sideway? No way. I was simply going to talk about that stuff while we were watching the movie. Which, incidentally, let’s start.” He waved his hand and the lights in the room turned dark, and an image appeared on the wall.

  “I still think it’s weird that these things can accommodate movie watching.”

  “I think you’re weird for thinking that’s weird in the first place.”

  Sam was prevented from replying to that idiotic statement by realizing what movie Farris had picked. “Why the hell did you pick The Simpsons Movie?”

  “What? You don’t like the Simpsons? I thought this was a good one.”

  “No, it is, I think. And I like them well enough. Just… why this?”

  “I don’t know. I just randomized a list of old Terran comedies a bunch of times and ended up picking this one. Figured this’ll do a fine enough job for a good first movie for us to watch together.”

  “I guess so… but still. It’s a weird choice, is all.”

  “I was thinking about Star Wars but—”

  “Nope.”

  “Agreed. The mentor figure dies two-thirds in. What kind of message is that?”

  “Sure, let’s go with that reason.”

  “And that’s the problem with a lot of mentorship movies, that the movie itself is not that happy. At least from what I understood from some of the plot synopses.”

  “If you say so. But if a happy movie with a mentor is what you were after, then you could’ve just picked The Sting.”

  Farris paused with a scowl. Turning sideways, he typed on an invisible keyboard before letting out a groan. “Oh… That would’ve been perfect. You’re right.”

  “Yep. It’s also one of my favorite movies, by the way.”

  “Now you’re just making me feel bad.”

  “You should feel bad. Your pick makes no thematic sense.”

  “At least it’s good, right?”

  “I don’t know. I only watched it twice, if I remember correctly. Once when I was a kid and once when I was still a kid but much older. I seem to recall enjoying it. It’s The Simpsons after all. A show so revolutionary and influential that it became vanilla. The movie is pretty much just that. It’s regarded as more like the ‘vintage’ Simpsons, I believe, which just means that the people who idolize the show’s early seasons think it’s good. So take that as you may. You wanted a movie you could talk through, though, and this is definitely one… Wait, why the hell am I even trying to excuse your movie pick? It’s your choice. Live with it.”

  “I thought it’d be a nice movie to watch. I never watched the show. Only seen clips of it.”

  “So for the movie date that’s taking place because you’re trying to cheer me up, you picked the movie you wanted to see?”

  “Maybe I wouldn’t have picked it if you’d have given me a list of your favorite movies. If I knew about that Sting movie, I would’ve definitely picked it.”

  Sam shrugged. “Nah, it’s your fault.”

  “So easy, isn’t it? Blaming your mentor. But one day you’ll wake up and you’ll discover I’m not there anymore. And who will you blame then?”

  “Ugh. Dude, don’t say any line like that ever again. You’re sounding like an emotionally manipulative parent.”

  “That is what I was going for, yes. Anyway, let’s get down to business. So how was your week?”

  “And here it is, the dreaded question.”

  “It’s just polite. You being in a certain mental state and me being interested in how you fared since we parted are not intrinsically connected.”

  “Yet you don’t see me asking you how was your week.”

  “You’re not polite.”

  Sam chuckled. “Yeah, I suppose that’s true.”

  “So…?”

  “Ach... Week was fine. Still shit, but better than the one prior. And you already know about all the schedule changes, so I don’t need to run you through them.”

  “You don’t. And since my opinion’s worth all the gold in the world, you’ll be happy to know that I approve. You need to rest some more for the time being. But if you also think that you can go back to studying new material. Then I’m all for it.”

  “The big question is whether I will be able to study that new material.”

  “That’s not really a question. That’s just a baseless worry. You’ll see. I’m just waiting for the day when you manage to trace Skin Reinforcement again. And since I know that day will be coming soon, meaning while you’ll still be feeling like ‘shit,’ that means that you’ll how no recourse but to acknowledge the utility that the last two weeks of lessons have given you.”

  “I’m getting real tired of people being so fucking confident in themselves all the damn time.”

  “Confident in myself?” Farris tilted his head. “I’m confident in you.”

  “OK, sure. But what you talked about right now is more than being confident in me. It’s being confident in your analysis and assessment of me. If you were confident just about me, then you’d have said that you were sure I was going to succeed soon. Not all that other crap about any day now, and the lessons being useful for me.”

  “You’ll just take any excuse to look down on yourself, huh?”

  “This time I’m not. I’m being serious. You guys have an unnatural amount of self-confidence.”

  “Us guys?”

  “You, Dan, Maurice. Sarah, Felix, and Yvessa. Pretty much every ‘important’ person that I’ve met so far. It’s like you’re so sure of yourself because you’ve got this material basis for it in the form of levels and strength and… Well, Maurice’s is actually reasonable by my standards, I suppose.”

  “I have way more self-confidence than any of those guys.”

  “Undoubtedly you do. And you saying that is proof.”

  Farris laughed and pointed at the screen. “You got to admit, that was funny.”

  Sam nodded. “Sure. I remembered that scene though, so…”

  “Yeah, yeah, I get it. So, self-confidence makes you annoyed?”

  “A little bit, yeah. Also jealous. Also suspicious.”

  “I can see that. But I wouldn’t worry about it. You’ll get where ‘we’ are, eventually as well. Then you’ll realize just how hollow this self-confidence can be. Take your friends, for instance. You said they are all confident about their own strength and talents, right?”

  Sam nodded.

  “Now how confident are they about becoming Rulers, for example?”

  “I think they’re all pretty confident.”

  “Pretty confident, huh? That’s pretty good, I guess. But it’s not 100% right? Let me tell you something, I’m confident that you’ll become completely confident about making it to Ruler before any of them do.”

  “What’s that got to do with self-confidence being hollow?”

  “You’re right, that’s less to do with that, and more with the usual spiel about believing in yourself and whatnot. My point about your friends was that, for now at least, they are rational, reasonable, and self-critical beings. There are healthy bounds to their self-assurance, like in being certain that they’ll be able to become a Ruler. Or like for me, in everything that’s ‘Big and Important’ if you catch my drift. Which means that a lot of the time I’m not as confident in my actions, decisions, and beliefs as I’d like to be. As people who aren’t as self-critical, reasonable, and rational as you or me are. So the bit about self-confidence being hollow… that’s actually a good thing, and unfortunately, not really a universal guarantee.”

  Sam nodded before sighing. “I know the type… Narcissists are not a modern invention after all.”

  “Sure, plenty of them are that. But you’ll also meet plenty of people who simply never truly failed in their life. So they have the utmost confidence in themselves. A lot of Rulers are like that. They’ve made it to the—in essence—very top of society. And even if they got help along the way, they undoubtedly made it through the power of their own effort in the end. And so they possess an extreme level of self-assurance in themselves. Nothing obviously irrational, nothing malicious, they’re not narcissists or idiots. At least many of them aren’t. They just have no reason to doubt themselves. Thankfully, though, I don’t have to worry about you becoming like that.”

  Sam noticed the hint of worry in his voice, although he wasn’t sure if it was real of feigned. “So what? You’re worried one of my friends will become like that?”

  “It’s possible. I don’t know any of them well enough to discount it. But I’m not that worried for them, even without the reason of not having taking them under my wing…” He let the implication hang there.

  “I’m sure your niece will turn out fine.”

  Farris gulped. “Yeah… you’re right, I shouldn’t worry.” He smiled and winked at Sam. “She’s better than me in every way, after all. But you know what? Honestly, I think this movie’s quite good. I’m happy with my pick.”

  “That pick that was supposed to be for me?” Sam took the bait.

  “Remember what I told you when we first met? About a mentor’s-mentee relationship? Give and take, Sam. It’s all give and take.”

  “Leaving aside the question of what I’m taking. In this scenario, what exactly am I giving?”

  “Me an excuse to sit around on a Saturday and watch a movie with you? I promise you, I’m going to have a lot more fun once we get all of this mentor business out of the way and move to cracking jokes and making references. Steamed hams, right?”

  “No, I didn’t feel like burgers.”

  “What?”

  Sam rolled his eyes and pointed to the half-eaten tray on his lap. “A joke. Like you asked.”

  “Well it wasn’t a good one. I asked for good ones.”

  “Fuck you, it was plenty good. Not my fault you don’t pay attention to your environment.”

  “Newsflash smartass, I can’t see the tray.”

  “Yes you can. Stop trying to lie to me about how the communication works.”

  Farris sighed. “I am going to miss you not knowing stuff. A lot of good jokes will have to go untold because of that.”

  “Unpulled, maybe. Not untold. If you’re telling me a lie and you find it funny, you haven’t told a joke.”

  “Let’s just agree to disagree, then. Next you’ll tell me you don’t find practical jokes funny.”

  “I’m not going to tell you that, just like I’m not going to tell you a practical joke. Because doing that is impossible. The most you can do is tell someone about a practical jokes.”

  “Well I just want to say that the comedy today has been riveting.”

  “When exactly did you go from having me meet you once a week and even watch a movie together because I’m not feeling good and you wanted to… I don’t know, make me feel better or whatever? To just wanting me to entertain you?”

  Farris scratches his chin and turned his eyes upwards. “You’re right. That is quite a leap. Oh, OK, I know. I figured that since humor is the best medicine, that I’ll be helping you the most if I get you to make me laugh.”

  “That’s twisted.”

  “But it makes some sort of sense, right? Like if I do manage to put you in a situation where you’re cracking jokes, then I definitely did something right.”

  “Mhm… I see your point, yes. But to me, it feels more like an end result. I’ll only be cracking jokes if I’ve gone through the process of feeling better already.”

  “Exactly. So that’s why we’re watching a movie. It gets the process started for you, and the creative juices rolling. And before you know it, you’re feeling good enough to crack jokes and primed to do so.”

  “Pick a better movie next time.”

  “C’mon, the movie’s good!”

  “Yeah, it’s fine. But it’s not one that would get you, or me, at least, to start cracking jokes. The Sting isn’t one either, by the way. You need something that invites the audience’s participation.”

  “What the hell does that mean?”

  Sam shrugged. “I don’t know. Just pick a better movie. Or better yet, don’t pick a movie, just pick something like The Bi—Nah, I’m not going to give you any ideas.”

  Farris narrowed his eyes before twirling his fingers above Sam’s head. “Oh… If I could just pick that cranium of yours. What manners of treasures might I find?”

  “I’ll trade you some treasures for state secrets. Anything political you want to teach me about?”

  “You are a cruel tempter, to provide such a devil’s bargain. Begone with your deals. We will have our knowledge gained in a much more ethical manner.”

  “One day Farris. One day. You’re going to have to spend a whole day talking to me about nothing but politics. And it would be contemporary politics. Heat of the moment events. And then where will your aloof facade slink to? When you’re forced to discuss with me the highest matters of state?”

  “OK, now you ruined it. Now I actually feel sad. I got a whole state dinner I need to go to later today, you know.”

  “Really?”

  “Really.”

  “I thought you didn’t go to those.”

  “I’m paying penance.”

  “Politics?”

  “Politics.”