lirvothethird

  "Ran out? Get over it already."

  I asked after the fourth time Ezreal searched his bag for his precious hair gel. The desert stretched out endlessly as thankfully, it wasn't blowing hot sand in our faces right now.

  "Nooo. You don't understand. It's the only reason I haven't burnt to a crisp."

  "The only reason I'm walking in the sun is so you don't feel bad for turning brown."

  "The blondies gonna kick me out now..."

  "What's a blondie?"

  "Cute girls with hair like mine. You wouldn't get it."

  He shook his head as a plume of sand came our way. I hoisted the stone walking stick as Ezreal took out a machete. I warned him as we waited.

  "Seems like an animal. Very big. Can you see anything?"

  "There's... people on it?"

  A grim smile appeared on my face.

  "Let's hope they're not hostile."

  "Or what?"

  "Or I'm gonna ditch you and run. Don't worry, your legacy will live on in my memories!"

  I mockingly wiped a tear as he ughed.

  "How bout you go distract them while I run? I'm sure you can escape quicker than me."

  The plume of sand got closer as it revealed a long animal, like a teardrop with webbed feet1Sandswimmers are massive quadrupedal creatures that traverse the Shuriman desert in cyclical patterns.. Its powerful tail churned the sand as it revealed that it wasn't just one of them... it was a triplet.

  However, what was a bigger surprise was that of the two distinct groups riding one each, it was that it didn't seem like they were in control. Instead, they were hanging off them using ropes or just bancing by leaning against them.

  "Pssst. Aerth. It looks fun to ride. I'm sure it's faster than walking right?"

  At some point in time he had already taken out some ropes and knotted it exactly like the ones already on the beasts. I cautiously nodded, what's the worse that can happen?

  Positioning ourselves to the side, he started spinning the rope. It naturally got flung out in an arch as it hooked on one of the ridges on the back. A tug made it secure as we started running.

  He deftly hopped on and reached his hand out as I grabbed it to pull myself up. Seating ourselves by hanging the rope under our arms, we took in the sight.

  The ride was slightly bumpy, with a small breeze and the sun beating down from above. The rge beast was like a bobber, one part above, and three parts below. Sand streamed in the front and out from some kind of hole on the side of their mouth.

  "Ughh. Gotta use the toilet. How do I get off?"

  Ezreal clutched his stomach as we rode. If he got off there was no way he could get back on.

  "Just do it on the beast."

  I looked into the clear blue sky as he processed my advice. A few seconds passed as the sound of a fabric rustling happened beside me. A whiff of a foul smell passed by with the wind as a few thunks happened in the sand.

  The convoy stopped. The animal turned around as a rising feeling of disgust welled up. I turned my head away as the convoy continued again. I muttered under my breath.

  "I guess that's how things work around here."

  "I think imma bout to throw."

  "And watch it turn around again? You disgusting freak."

  I scrunched my face at his signs of puking. Just knowing the fact that anything we leave behind had a chance of going in their mouthes filled me with nausea.

  Greenery surrounded flowing water. A magnificent illusion if there was one. We had almost been tricked multiple times by oasis' and glittering sand. But this? It stretched out as far as the eye could see.

  "Left or right?"

  Ezreal pulled out his 'exploration notes' and flipped through the pages.

  "The emperor likes fishing. So he made his tomb near his favorite fishing spot."

  "Are you serious? It was written like that?"

  I leaned over to look at his notes. He pulled it away as he spoke in a 'grand' tone.

  "Fine. On the 30th year of his reign, I was invited to his majesty's grand fishing festival as a fair and just arbitrator. The river dale was widened as-"

  "Okay! I get it, I get it, no need to continue. Let's get walking."

  Swarms of insects buzzed over the water as we walked closer. The water rippled underneath them as some dropped into the water. My original pns of dipping in the water was dashed.

  "The water is full of these bugs..."

  "Nah. Look under there."

  "Under wear?"2Not this childish joke...

  Ezreal pointed slightly to the side. Small dark shadows swam around in clusters as bubbles broke through the water every so often. Some cyan colored droplets were held at the tip of the shadows, as they disappeared, an insect fell.

  I pulled a leaf made out of many thinner leaves from a short bush. Holding it under the insects, some parts rippled as nothing was left on the leaves. It was completely dry.

  "Do you see what I'm seeing?"

  He kicked me from behind.

  "What, those magic projectiles? Hurry up, stop dallying."

  As I got up, he crouched down. Using a tube, that he assured me worked using hextech, he pulled some water up. It worked by heating it the moment it passed through the other side, burning all the bug eggs and nasty stuff in the water. The next thing to do after using it is to let it sit for a bit so the nasty stuff sinks to the bottom, then skim the good water out.

  "Look at who's the one taking his time."

  I pulled out a thin strip of extremely hard goat jerky to gnaw on for the taste. Salt tasted great if it wasn't for the desert. Apparently if you soaked meat in seawater, boiled it until it got crusty, you would end up with this. They must've siphoned off the meat juices in the middle of boiling otherwise it wouldn't only taste like gamey salt.

  It wasn't for nothing that they had the best mb soup in town.

  Once he was done refilling his water we continued walking in the half sandy half muddy area.

  Strange birds with stubby wings that walked on nd, rats that jumped with long tails, crabs that was square, a spiky golden ball that rolled, rge green feathered birds all passed us as we followed the river.

  "Something's under there."

  After a little bit of digging, the entrance was revealed. Symbols adorned the entrance, pulsing slightly. How are all these ruins still intact and full of energy? Like what, they're built on ley lines? Ezreal started reading the epithet hung above the entrance.

  "Emperor that likes fishing. Famous for being penniless. Records of every fish caught in his lifetime. And what's this? Museum of fish? Is this a dud? Let's just search it quickly. In and out!"

  "In and out."

  We bumped fists and headed in.

  The moment we entered, small blue fires with a yellow center lit up in torchholders, resulting in a somewhat whitish glow. What was with them to light it up whenever someone entered?

  I led the way, tapping the ground in front with a stick, transferring my weight to it to detect anything on the ground. Ezreal spotted the sides. Paintings of fish adorned the wall with words written on the side. He talked from behind as I waited for him to

  "Security will come if items are touched?"

  "Don't see any security though... Wait wait wait. Don't touch it yet. Let's first scout the tomb first."

  He retracted his hand as we continued walking around. The lights behind us blinked out, sending shiver down my spine. A rumble happened as dust shook from the ceiling.

  "The walls changed. Should we just bust through?"

  The groan of steel could be heard a distance away. Rumbling towards us was a giant rock smoothed into a ball. The ground behind us had small spikes id out. What looked like a safe cavity had pipes running through the top, ready to pour its dried up fluid.

  There wasn't much time left. Should I try to cut through the rock? Or just walk out the side? I decided to do neither.

  "Let's go!!!"

  I shouted as I made a circur hole snting down. Once he fit in, we just waited, as the ball rolled over the top.

  "Wait. Uhhh, how do I say this? There's like another tomb underneath this one. I don't know how I didn't detect it before hand, but there's just like a rge corridor underneath."

  "Yeah, let's just go there. That penniless bastard set up so many traps without even a hint of gold."

  We are technically the bastards but who cares?