UnluckyPerspective

  The door clicked shut behind them.

  Inside, the house was still intimidating, but it was more like cozy-intimidating. The kind of intimidating you get when you're comparing your apartment to someone who has their shit together and not the sort that looked straight out of a horror movie. It continued the vaguely Victorian theme that the outside of the building had, all hardwood and tasteful upholstery, but it also had kind of a homey feel to it that caught Ash off guard. There was a big closet just inside the door, though it was currently occupied less with coats than it was with copious amounts of Halloween candy including the forementioned full-sized snickers bars and also a bunch of weird brands that Ash was quite confident he’d never heard of. Did toad crunch bars have actual toads in them? Was it just a witch joke? He was kind of curious.

  The candy boxes spread out into the hall too, where an old spiral staircase went up to what was presumably the second floor, and something about the smell reminded him a bit of a library. If there was one thing that really caught his attention though, it was that the house was dim. There was light, sure, but the house was lit by what looked to be honest to god candles. The ck of “proper” lighting meant that it was a bit darker than he was used to, but it was a homey sort of darkness. The kind you get on Earth Day when you’re pretending to be environmentally conscious and not the sort you get when dad “forgets” to pay the electrical bill again. It was cozy.

  The big demon dy herded him into the house, directing him past the stairs and further into the living room where a big puffy couch sat across from a gss table and what looked like an otherwise normal psma TV. Wood shelves lined the walls, filled with the books that probably made the pce smell like a library and also a bunch of DVDs. And was that a VHS pyer? There was kind of a weird mix of stuff here for a house lit by candles. And oddly, a lot of pnts. The very top of the bookshelves housed a spider-pnt that was making itself right at home, the one pot currently having tendrils that touched the top of every other shelf.

  Ash found himself plopped down on the couch, the fluffy bnkets that usually rested upon its surface tossed unceremoniously to the side as his host made space for him.

  “Okay.” She said, positively vibrating with excitement as she pulled bottles and brushes and bits of wood out of the pockets of her robe. “Okay I’ve got my stuff, and oh my gosh you’re going to be so cute when I’m done with you. I – wait shoot, sorry, that’s the first thing I should ask. Do you want to be cute? Like, is cute okay, or do you want to be cool, or like maybe just pretty, cause cats can be any or all of those things and I want to make sure you’re onboard with whatever we do since it’s your body and all.”

  Ash just sort of gawped at her.

  “Ah, sorry, that might’ve been too much at once. Do you, um, want to be cute?” the witch asked.

  Ash nodded enthusiastically, once he’d rebooted again.

  “Do you want to be cool?”

  Ash paused for a moment, but ultimately shook his head no.

  “Do you want to be pretty?”

  Ash couldn’t nod fast enough at the suggestion, which prompted another set of giggles from the witch and a reoccurrence of the really nice smile that continued to make him feel all fluffy inside.

  “You really want to be pretty huh?” she asked, grinning as she grabbed another set of brushes. “Okay, I can certainly work with that.”

  Ash probably should’ve been embarrassed that he’d just admitted he wanted to be pretty, and he certainly wouldn’t admit that he was blushing, but instead this was the point at which point he finally figured out what she was actually suggesting with her offer to update his costume because it was makeup. Oh my god it was makeup – a girl was going to do his makeup and okay he needed to act cool. Not like, cool-cool because that was never going to happen, but at least not freak out. Having someone do his makeup had been one of Ash’s fantasies for years – probably for normal guy reasons – and he could hardly believe it was actually happening. It would be really embarrassing if he died of an excitement-induced heart attack right before one of his long-time dreams was granted. Gosh, and she was such a talented artist. She looked exactly like he’d imagine a demoness to look, and he couldn’t even tell how she’d done her horns. Maybe she really was a witch.

  Said witch might’ve misunderstood his sudden vibrating, because she gave him a pat on the shoulder and a reassuringly friendly smile. “Don’t worry. If you want to be pretty, then I am going to make you the prettiest cat at that party. Just you wait.”

  Ash absolutely couldn’t.

  “Okay, so the first thing I’m going to need is just to take a look at the shape of your face okay? Do your best not to move.” She directed.

  Ash followed her instructions, staying almost perfectly still as she intently stared at one of the parts of himself he really hated. It was kind of stressing him out to be so closely observed, but he told himself it was for a good cause probably as she circled him slowly.

  The witch nodded - to herself? – and then two little tips of a forked tongue stuck out through her teeth as she started mixing colours together on her palette.

  Something about the setup didn’t quite feel right, but Ash had never actually been brave enough to look into makeup beyond the very basics, so he was probably just wrong. The witch began. The room was cold, and the wet cloth she washed his face with was colder. Cold enough to make him shiver, but when she reached up to steady his face, her hand was not. It was warm, and it gripped his jaw with a strength that said she could probably break him if she wanted and a gentleness that said she wouldn’t and he had totally normal reactions to that. He focused on the hand instead of the cold. The world seemed to recede away. Disappearing into sponges and brushstrokes and the strong, warm grip that held him. Even the Halloween revelers were quiet, leaving the two in their own little world, together with the sound of their breathing and Ash’s pounding heart and the gentle touch of a brush.

  He didn’t actually know half of what she was doing, but that left plenty of room for his imagination to run wild. She’d said he’d be cute and she’d said he’d be pretty and he didn’t actually know what he would look like because his image of himself was incompatible with either of those things, but he desperately wanted to be both, and in the comfort of his imagination and the care of a pretty woman – in that moment he felt both.

  He did think something was a little weird when she started stroking his hair, but the feeling of someone running incredibly warm fingers through it did not incline him towards protest. Instead he struggled not to lean into the sensation, to stay quiet instead of making happy noises as she massaged his scalp. It went on for longer than he would’ve thought, as she worked all the way down from the top of his head to the base of his neck, massaging his face and around his ears and the top of his head with a thoroughness that felt intentional before returning to his scalp and running her fingers through his hair again.

  He was very disappointed when it stopped.

  His focus on her breathing seemed to increase in intensity. Everything felt louder. Muscles in his head he didn’t even know he had rexed, and he could hear that her heart was pounding with a tempo that wasn’t quite as bad as his was but which still felt faster than being at rest. He couldn't tell if he'd been able to hear that before or if it was just his imagination. The street was audible again too now, and he wondered if there was a draft in the house or something, because he definitely couldn't hear it before. And gosh, that dy out there screaming about demons had issues.

  Ash became absolutely certain something was weird when she opened his mouth.

  "Uhhrm" he said, as she held his jaw open with her thumb. "Whar ar yww doonng?"

  "Shh." she said, as she started painting his teeth.

  He decided to let her – and even tried to remain still when she took a foul-tasting brush to his tongue a whole bunch of times – but he was starting to worry that this might be a prank.

  "Okay, you should be able to close it now." She said, so he did.

  His mouth felt different in so many ways he was having trouble pcing what exactly had changed other than somehow feeling pointier(?), but his ability to explore that thought was interrupted by her next action.

  "Stay really really still." She said, as she held his eyelid open.

  "Uh." He replied smartly, and then she poked him in the eye with a makeup brush.

  Ash was kind of having second thoughts at this point, but in being forced to keep his eyes open he was actually looking right at her face, and she didn't look like she was fucking with him. She moved with a clear focus and a careful precision that made him feel like there was actually a good reason she kept poking him in the eye, so he did his best to tolerate it. He only half-blinked a crap ton as she repeated the movement a whole bunch of times with a series of brushes and coloured pastes, and then did the whole thing over again in his other eye. The only reason he managed not to close them at all was because she was basically holding open his eyes.

  When she’d finally finished and his eyes had stopped watering, he could almost swear that the lighting felt different. It felt like there was brightness to the room that wasn’t there before, but it easily could’ve been his imagination or the fact that he’d been blinking so much his eyes were half closed for a couple minutes and had gotten used to the darkness.

  Ash liked it much better when she went back to normal makeup things.

  His cheeks, his eyebrows, his nose. The witch worked her way all around his face, touching up things she’d already started but was only now coming back to, and then once that was finished she went even lower, working on his chin and his jaw and then daubing his throat with a sponge before doing the finishing touches with her other tools. After what felt like far too long and yet also not long at all, the Witch took a step back, looking him over with an appraising but appreciative expression that made him feel a little warm inside despite the temperature of the room.

  He hoped he was actually pretty.

  “Gosh, you look amazing.” She said, almost as if hearing his thoughts. Ash wasn’t sure he believed her but the idea that it was true made him blush and stare at the floor, which prompted a little giggle from the witch. Still grinning, she looked a bit lower, “okay, now take off your shirt.”

  Ash wasn’t sure if he should be concerned with how readily he followed instructions from a pretty stranger, but soon he was shivering even more in the cold of her house, top half bared to the world.

  She looked down on him studiously, though he could've sworn her already red skin was a slightly darker shade than it had started. He could definitely hear her heart beating faster. She looked him over for probably a tiny bit longer than might be socially acceptable (assuming he had any idea at all where those lines even were) before finally clearing her throat.

  "Okay so your shoulders are probably dainty enough that we could leave them as is, but uh, depending on what kind of cat you were thinking of, did you want...?" She asked, trailing off as she looked over his chest.

  Ash nodded. He wasn’t really sure what he was agreeing to, but he nodded anyways.

  She nodded too, and then the little tongue was back as she rearranged some things on her board. It was kind of unfair how someone even taller and more muscur than he was could have such a cute expression, but also she was helping him come closer to being cute in theory if he understood what was going on, and that took the edge off his envy.

  So mostly it was cute.

  She started off by wiping him clean with the horrible rag again. He managed not to yelp, but only barely. Raising the sponge again, she went back to work. Starting with some dark stuff she smeared it around the center of his chest, spreading out to the side before coming back and touching it up with a lighter shade, alternating light and dark pigment as she moved. He was obviously ft as a board, but as she worked on him, blending those colours together again, a different sort of form took shape. He was pretty sure it was called contouring, but while he knew it was supposed to emphasize structure, what she was doing went well beyond that. Before his very eyes a chest was forming – something that he definitely didn’t have and which shouldn't actually make a convincing illusion when there wasn’t anything there to augment – yet convince him she was. He knew what his chest was supposed to look like and the job she was doing still messed with his eyes.

  And then there was a moment where the view was so lifelike, so believably three dimensional that it was giving him a headache, and with a feeling not unlike having your ears pop except deep in his brain he suddenly found himself staring at what was unambiguously a breast. Not the illusion of a breast, but the real thing, something his eyes told him was actually there and which his body agreed with. He could feel the weight of it; see it move with the rise and fall of his chest. And as she worked on the finishing touches, working beneath the swell of his suddenly changed body, the tip of the brush actively disappeared from view.

  Ash giggled. He couldn't help it, this was just so far beyond anything he'd ever dreamed of happening and the energy of the moment was bubbling up out of him regardless of any intent. His ugh was different too, a high, musical, slightly deranged noise that he definitely couldn't have made only an hour ago but which was deeply validating on some primal level, his new boob shaking along as he did.

  Only the one though, because his hysterical ughter had interrupted her work on the other one.

  “Uh, are you okay?” the witch asked, looking up at him with some concern.

  Ash just grinned at her. He definitely wasn’t able to talk right now, but this was okay. This was very okay, and he did his best to show her that by his expression. She seemed to get the message after a couple vigorous and very smiley nods, and, satisfied that he really was okay, she finally went back to work.

  He was still shaking a little bit, but he'd mostly managed to get control of himself, at least enough to stop ughing outwardly. Still, the lopsided shape of his chest and the fact that it kept moving made it difficult for her to finish working and, after gncing up at him a couple times to confirm it was okay, the witch finally reached up to grab his one shaking breast so she could keep him still enough to finish the other one. Her hand was incredibly warm, and she held him firmly. Even with the size difference his new chest made a satisfying handful. He bit his lip to stop himself from making any noises, holding his breath as she finally made progress on finishing the other one.

  If her attention had been in a different pce he might’ve been having some very different thoughts right now, but her focus was so clear, her eyes so fixated, her attention so obviously on her work that it was possible for him to maintain some sembnce of self-control right up until she finished it and he remembered that the thing she was fixating on was his breasts.

  Both of them realized it at the same time, and both of them responded by turning away and staring at the floor. He was definitely sure she was blushing now, and at this point he was no longer capable of denying that he was too. Someone he found very attractive had just been staring intently at his boobs.

  Gosh that was a weird thought.

  “Okay, um.” She said quietly.

  Ash managed to pull his eyes away from the walls and down to meet hers again. Slowly and cautiously, she lowered herself just enough to pce a hand on his belt.

  "Do you-" she started, to which he nodded vigorously before she could even finish.

  She closed her mouth for a moment, looking into his face as if trying to read it.

  "Are you sure?" she asked softly.

  Ash nodded again.

  “You don't have to if you don’t want to.” She said.

  I do want to he thought, but could mostly only express with pleading eyes and continued nodding. She seemed to get the message though, nodding to herself and taking a deep breath.

  “I’m going to take your pants off then.” She said quietly, hooking a thumb into his waistband.

  And then he was naked, and it was still absolutely freezing.

  "Cute." She mumbled, gncing down at him before biting her lip with a wide-eyed look of guilty horror that suggested she probably didn’t mean to say that out loud.

  Part of him felt like he was supposed to protest, maybe throw out a stock phrase like “its cold!” or whatever it was guys were supposed to say when their genitals were commented on, but internally he was struggling with the admission that he was happier to be called cute than he was offended by the idea some parts he’d never asked for were small. It also was pretty cold, which was probably a good thing because otherwise he'd been in an even more embarrassing state right now.

  And then she took him in an extraordinarily warm hand to keep him still for the next step, and that embarrassing state began to happen. He could hear her heart rate spike so it was obvious that she noticed, but she erased the thing with a few deft strokes of a sponge before it could really become a problem.

  And then it was gone, and he was smooth.

  Both of them were now breathing a lot harder, and he had no doubt that she blushing now. She was positively crimson even if she'd managed to keep a professional look on her face, and Ash felt like he probably wasn't many shades off.

  After a short pause she started moving again, turning the Barbie-doll nothing that existed between his legs into something different.

  Some part of him felt like he should’ve been upset about the erasure of his lower bits, but instead he was excited in an only sort of sexual sense as he watched a different set take shape. He’d never really gotten a terribly close look at the opposite sex’s parts, yet seeing them form on him filled him with a giddiness that was disproportionate with the idea that it was just because he was a little horny. There was even a bit at the end where she had the tip of the brush inside of him, which was not actually comfortable but still made him happy somehow, if only because it was novel. Yeah, because it was novel probably. And then she was done, and it was once again time for the embarrassing moment where they both realized she was now staring intently at an intimate part of his body and not at an art piece again.

  She tore her eyes away, looking pointedly at the walls.

  Ash kind of felt like he should cover himself, but he wasn’t sure if that would be rude considering she had just created all the parts that he wanted to cover.

  He also wasn’t sure if it was bad that he kind of wanted her to look at him again, but she was really pretty, and the fact that she’d done all of this to his body had more than endeared her to him already. Also, his friends had pushed him in here for like, getting together reasons right? Which meant physical things? Wanting her to look at him was sorta normal, right? Because it, y’know, it sometimes maybe led to other stuff?

  "Okay." She said quietly.

  Ash fidgeted, looking at her expectantly but not seeing an obvious way for this to go next. She’d already gone so much further than he’d ever dreamed with this makeover, what more could she possibly do?

  "Can you turn around and bend over?" She directed.

  Ash blinked.

  The witch was absentmindedly stirring some things on her palette by the time he’d rebooted, so it couldn’t have been that long. And she didn’t look embarrassed, so he’d probably misheard her somehow. Or misunderstood her somehow.

  Ash repeatedly turned over her instructions in his mind.

  That was like, a sexually charged phrase right? She was still looking at her stuff, which was also pointedly staring at anything that wasn’t him, but Ash couldn’t help but interpret the suggestion in line with his previous train of thought which was the way his friends had been pushing him. Like, it probably wasn’t actually what she’d meant and he was only having stupid thoughts because they were a bunch of overeager idiots – but also it could be what she meant, right?

  Ash took a moment to gnce down at the demon who’d been so professionally doing his makeup.

  She was… definitely blushing. There was no doubt about that anymore, which didn’t necessarily mean anything but also didn’t necessarily not mean anything, and there was a part of him that really wanted it to mean something even if okay no this was definitely a delusion. Her outfit was still amazing and the fact that she was crouching meant he could kind of see straight down the boob window which he was going to do his best to pretend he didn’t notice, and also how was he not aware of how much he liked colrbones? Fuck.

  And um, also her pants were tight and there might’ve been a bit of a bulge there that he hadn’t previously noticed.

  Which was not exactly what he was expecting, but also, okay, yeah, that was fair. She was a makeup artist who could literally alter body parts with it. Why wouldn’t she maybe have nonstandard equipment? Would that really be so strange? If you could change yourself on a whim with a couple strokes of a brush, it seemed perfectly reasonable that you might do it to yourself every once in a while if you wanted to. Or, y’know, you might just mess around until you found something you were comfortable with. That seemed normal? It’s not like he would’ve chosen what he’d started with so he couldn’t bme anyone else for messing around.

  And while it maybe wasn’t exactly what he’d been imagining when he’d been having prior delusions about maybe doing things with her, now that he also had different equipment than he’d started with he maybe wouldn’t mind the idea of one of those things being involved provided he wasn’t the one who had to use it and oh god now he was really being delusional.

  Okay. Focus. She hadn’t even really suggested anything. She’d been so careful about asking about everything else, this was way too fast for it to suddenly be taking a turn, and he was a friggin idiot.

  … Could it?

  Like, she was really pretty and totally his type and maybe he was okay with that pn regardless of which particur manner she would’ve meant it in? Not that it was a pn, but would it really be so bad? Since she clearly knew magic then maybe she could feel he was onboard with things and then maybe she suggested it because of that? If that was the case he would’ve liked it if she’d given him a bit more warning. And also maybe moved somewhere warmer, this room was freezing.

  Though she was radiating heat, and if they were to do stuff, then she’d be pressed up against him. He’d be sharing in her warmth while they embraced, her arms around him, her…

  … other parts…

  … Oh god he was so filled with delusions.

  "Is everything okay? She asked, finally gncing up at him.

  Ash did as she’d instructed, heart pounding and mind filled with one hundred percent certainty that his face was the same shade of red she’d started – regardless of how badly he’d just misread the situation.

  No matter what was about to happen, which was probably nothing, Ash would let her do as she will.

  His breathing was hard to control but he was doing his best because even if nothing was going to happen, he hadn’t quite managed to convince himself that nothing was going to happen and nothing was going to happen.

  But what if it did?

  The witch grasped his hip with an incredibly warm hand, stroking the other one all the way down his back in a way that was definitely not sensual. He needed a cold shower. Actually, he took it back, the room was cold but it should’ve been colder.

  She held him in pce with one hand, the other hand continuing to do… something to the base of his lower back. Low enough that it was below what he thought of as his lower back but high enough that he felt like calling it his butt was misleading. There, her fingers remained, doing whatever it was they were doing.

  It was kind of ticklish, and a lottle weird.

  Ash couldn’t tell if he was disappointed or not. Did that mean she wasn’t going to do anything? It would be really embarrassing if he’d been the only one having horny thoughts here. Oh god, and he was totally exposing himself to her right now. Was he a terrible pervert?

  Ash swished his tail in agitation.

  “Uh.” the witch said, drawing Ash’s attention back to her. She was deeply red faced. Like, deep to the point she was verging on purple, which was a lot darker than she had started. “I get that you’re excited to have a tail. But I need you to keep it still in order to finish it.”

  “Oh.” Ash murmured. “Ohhhhhhh.”

  It was a tail. She was painting him a tail. That’s what this had been about. She’d wanted him to turn around so she could work on a tail.

  Ash buried his face in his hands, doing his best not to allow the deeply delusional groan of embarrassment to escape as she continued to work. Now that he knew what she was doing he could feel all the changes she was making to it. Tails were sensitive apparently. And ticklish. And really hard to hold still when someone was trying to touch them.

  But, with a dose of reality dousing his thoughts in cold water and also a desire to have a tail because swishing it had been really nice substitution for general fidgeting, Ash pushed through – holding it still enough for her to work on for almost a full third of the time he was trying.

  She didn’t compin though, just pausing every time he lost control of the urge to move it, and after another embarrassing couple minutes, it was over.

  “Okay um, I’m all done.” The Witch said, after another moment of silence in which he was still trying and failing to keep the tail still. “You can turn around again. And uh, stand up.”

  Ash did the second bit first. Turning around was a lot harder, but the fact that he could swish some of the energy out now instead of just vibrating helped.

  And then he did it, and he was standing in front of her again – only this time naked and very different looking – and she was fidgeting and trying to look anywhere other than the all of him she’d just changed. In the coldness of the room there was actually enough heat radiating off her that it was noticeably warmer on the side where she was standing.

  Ash was cold, but also feeling kind of giddy in a way that he wasn’t sure he’d ever felt. And she was the reason for it. And he didn’t even know how to thank her. How did one say thank you for something like this? He wanted to hug her, but that was what he wanted and not what she wanted and maybe it wasn’t appropriate – but he wanted to hug her and the feeling was so strong it felt like it was going to explode out of him if he didn’t. He was gonna hug her.

  Ash hugged her.

  He was so, incredibly, incredibly overwhelmed right now but in a good way that actually talking was going to be out of the question for a little bit, so instead he put those feelings into a squeeze. A big squeeze, one that was very tight and kind of cozy and her heart was so much louder from up close, and she was really, really warm. Also, firm. Holy shit, he could feel her abs through the robe.

  “Ah- I- uh” the Witch mumbled.

  Ash squeezed her a little harder.

  A moment ter, she pced her own hand on his back, which reassured him that he had not just completely fucked up whatever level of social interaction this was. But it was still not quite reciprocating so he had tons of room to panic internally, and then, slowly, almost tentatively, she returned the hug, wrapping her own arms around him and leaning into it.

  It was beautifully warm. And nice. And gosh she was so good at hugging.

  And he still really wanted to thank her and he was at least going to try. “Th.. thank you.” He finally managed. It was barely a whisper and he wasn’t entirely sure he hadn’t just mouthed it except he couldn’t have just mouthed it because there were a lot of other feelings going on there and that had actually gotten stronger when he’d talked due to the realization that his ugh wasn’t the only thing that had changed which couldn’t have happened if he hadn’t talked and that meant he had to have actually talked. His whole voice was now cuter and softer and somehow more musical and with all of the everything going on that was overwhelming enough to drive the rest of the words right out of him. He was feeling so very overwhelmed and this was just… god he was so happy right now. He did his best to convey his continued feelings with the force of his squeezing. And like, holy shit, had he just talked? He had to have right?

  She squeezed him back. She was so warm. He kind of wanted this to go on forever.

  Sadly, soon it had gone on long enough that it was maybe reaching the bounds of what he thought might’ve been socially acceptable – assuming he had any idea of what those bounds were, which was a gamble because he definitely didn’t – and it was finally time for things to end, mostly because his rising anxiety about not knowing the point at which things should end was starting to encroach on the feeling of happiness at being hugged, and he didn’t want to taint the memory.

  Ash tried to step away from her, but the hand on his back almost absentmindedly stopped him from escaping. Instead, the attempt mostly allowed him to lean back a little bit – still pressed up against her, but now able to actually see her face.

  She was blushing, biting her lip as she stared at the wall instead of him.

  Ash was… not entirely sure how he felt about it. He probably wasn’t disappointed. Not at all. Really. He didn’t still want her to look at him or anything.

  “Um. I hope you have fun at the party!” She said, still staring at the wall.

  Ash defted.

  Right, the party. He was going to a party tonight. He was going to have to go deal with crowds and people and – and fuck, he was going to have to expin how he suddenly looked like this! He’d never figured out an excuse!

  “Nnnnnnng.” Ash groaned, pressing his forehead against her.

  “Ah.” She said.

  It took another moment for her to move, but when she did, she patted him on the back in a comforting manner. Which was also really nice, and also still not actually thanking her and a further of example of how one-sided this all was and a;dahfdk;ghaghj;ah. How do people people? Social was hard! He knew he was doing it wrong but not how to do it right.

  Ash sighed, taking a moment to work up the courage to look at her only to be surprised when she was looking back. She was looking at him! Ash heard her breath catch as they made eye contact, and frankly, he wasn’t actually sure if he’d been breathing before but he definitely wasn’t now. Both of their heart rates were higher than he thought either of their normals were, but pressed up against her he didn’t actually need ears to hear that – he could feel it. And she was looking at him! And her eyes were so soft and as he stared into them he had this tiny inkling of a feeling like he could just maybe let a little bit of that delusional hope out of the box.

  Just a bit.

  The door to her house smmed open.

  Ash completely reflexively hid behind her as the enormous spider from outside scrambled into the hall, knocking over boxes and throwing candy into the air and across the floor as it ran.

  “Otto?” the demon said, turning to face it just as her almost-a-question was answered by the entrance of a woman screaming about “the Fallen One’s familiar” and brandishing a cross.

  And a revolver.